Updated March 10, 2022 – As life would have it, previous plans were quickly thrown out of the window when heavy storms pounded middle Tennessee for 4-days straight. These flooded the waterways with debris, swelled the river by nearly 7-feet and kicked up the current to “too dangerous to let people out on the water” speeds – according to the TVA (Tennessee Valley Authority). This meant that our ride scheduled in late February had to be postponed to March.
So alas, here we are again! Yes, we’re going to try this ride this coming Friday, March 25th, 2022. All of the pertinent information is still below. We’ll be meeting at Old Hickory Dam Boat Ramp (address below) at 6am. We’ll be spreading out our fuel stops apart between 84 and 110 miles, so again, you’re going to want to bring extra fuel with you. Additionally, we’re “cannonball running” this, so we’re not stopping for food – so pack snacks and plenty to drink. Everything else is below:
Published February 22, 2022 – With a handful of daring lunatics committing to join me for an idiotic adventure, we’re going forward with this ride. Currently, weather predictions aren’t favorable: calls for early morning rain, air temps are forecasted with a high of 47º and coming after 3 days’ worth of rainfall, we are wholly expecting the water to be full of debris – so pay particular attention to objects in the water. Nobody wants to puncture their hull on a submerged tree branch at 60mph.
Sunrise is set for 6:23am. Expect to be at the ramp at 6am. It’s a long, narrow one-lane launch so it takes a couple minutes to unload. The address is Old Hickory Dam Boat Ramp (1250 Cinder Road, Old Hickory, TN 37138). We are planning to be underway at 6:30am sharp. Considering these conditions, it is extraordinarily unlikely that we will complete the 440-mile round trip. Rather, we will continue up the Cumberland River as far as we can until 12:30pm and turn back around.
The first scheduled fuel stop is set to be Clarksville Marina – some 80 miles downriver. Then, the next stop is Green Turtle Bay Marina, another 100 miles from Clarksville. (This long stretch is why bringing extra fuel is required – particularly for you supercharged PWC.) If conditions permit, the next stop is Paris Landing Marina, 40 miles down the Tennessee River, where we’ll fill up and retrace our path back to the Old Hickory Dam Boat Ramp.
Originally published on February 9th, 2022 – Over a year and a half ago, we dreamed up an absolutely stupid idea of a pinned wide-open, no holds barred “cannonball run” style ride with minimal fuel stops that stretched over 400 miles of Middle Tennessee riverways. The initial plan was thwarted in Spring of 2020 after austere Covid shutdowns made traveling almost impossible. So instead of waiting, we did it ourselves. And with 2022 looking a lot better – at least in regards to cross-state travel – we’re bringing back That Dam Tennessee Ride with absolutely zero time for anyone to prepare.
Yeah, that’s right. We’re doing it in a little over two weeks’ time. Friday, February 25th at 6am to be exact. The Farmer’s Almanac says it’s going to rain. Even www.accuweather.com gives it a 58-percent chance of rain. We’re going to be watching the weather pretty closely the week preceding to see if Mother Nature changes her mind. If not, we’ll reschedule because riding 400-plus-miles at 60mph sounds like being covered in porcupine quills and then being shot at with an automatic paint ball gun. If we do call the ride for a “rain delay” expect it to be pushed back into March.
The route itself is pretty simple: We start @ 6:30am at the bottom of Old Hickory Dam (mile 216); lock through Cheatham Dam @ 8am; and end at Paris Landing State Park (est. 220 miles total). Then we turn around and go back the way we came. Sounds easy enough, right? Well, that’s the rub. Traversing 440-miles in less than 11 hours takes careful calculation of fuel range and consumption, and navigation. We’ll be piloting our trusty 2021 Sea-Doo RXP-X 300 and you know that girl is thirsty, so we’ll be packing as much extra fuel as possible.
Fuel is available at:
• Rock Harbor (Mile 175.6)
• Clarksville Marina (Mile 132.3)
• Lake Barclay Marina (Mile 59, 3 miles off river)
• Green Turtle Bay Marina (Mile 32) – TN River mileage markers start all over
• Paris Landing Marina (Mile 68)
Again, with early predictions calling for a full day’s worth of downpour, we may have to move this. Equally, we don’t want to ride the next day as rain runoff makes for a veritable floating mine field. Rather, we’ll bump it a couple weeks further up the calendar. This will have an average moving speed of 55-60mph, so if you’ve got something that can’t hang, you’ll be left behind. Equally, we’re not stopping for lunch so pack a sandwich and some granola bars to eat on the fly. We’re racing the clock on this one.
If you’re seriously interested in participating, reach out at [email protected].
